My Personal Miracle
If you have ever read this blog’s inaugural post Why Win Your Mind, you know that my early life was filled with abuse, neglect and poverty. I have struggled with depression and a host of other issues because of those early experiences, but in the last few years, my life has radically changed. One of the reasons I have been able to change is because of the supportive family that has sprung up around me. My wife and children, of course, but another family as well.
As I was beginning high school, my biological mother got married (to my half brother’s grandfather no less), and they decided they didn’t really want me in their home. Since my biological mother would no longer receive a welfare check for having me, there was really no reason for them to keep me around. By the end of my freshman year, I was kicked out of the house and found myself on the street. I spent the summer with a good friend, but they were unable to house me past the end of summer. So, off I went into the foster care system.
Life as a ward of the state is a challenge. You feel rootless, and homeless, and you only have a place to live at the whim of the people who volunteer to be foster parents. If they decide that they don’t want you to live with them any longer, it is out and on to another temporary place. I think the most difficult part is that you are without a real family.
My first foster home was an absolute nightmare. I was placed with the single mother of a thirteen year old gang-banger. She was a practicing Wiccan, and was very hostile to the Christian beliefs I held at that time. Her son and his friends would attempt to beat the snot out of me on a regular basis, and I was threatened with juvenile detention by his mother when I defended myself.
I descended into serious depression, and was falling behind in my schoolwork. I felt like I really wasn’t going to survive much longer if I didn’t find a way out. I considered running away and living on the streets again, but that idea didn’t fit well with the dreams I had for my life. I decided to approach the youth pastor of the church I was attending, and see if he knew of any foster families within the church who would be willing to take me in. He didn’t know of any families off hand, but he said he would make an announcement in church and see if anyone would come forward.
Here Comes The Miracle
I didn’t know it at the time, but a wonderful couple in the church had been talking and praying about becoming foster parents. They had no children of their own, and wanted to share the blessings of their life with kids in difficult circumstances. After the Sunday service, they approached the youth pastor, and asked for more information, and wanted to meet me. The social worker who was in charge of my case scheduled a meeting and drove me out to their home.
I was so nervous about meeting them. I was desperate for a new, more stable home, but I didn’t want to appear too needy. As we talked for about an hour, I knew this was the place I belonged. I couldn’t tell you why, it was just an intuitive sense that everything was going to be alright. As the meeting came to a close, they said they wanted to talk it over a little bit, and they would make a decision within a couple of days. They must have had the discussion pretty quickly because they came running out of the house as we were pulling out of the driveway and said that they wanted to take me.
I was in absolute shock. They made up their mind that quickly to take me in! I was beyond excited about having a new home. These people were different, and I knew it. I knew I would have a safe, secure place to live until I graduated high school.
Making it through high school was good enough for me. I didn’t expect anything from this new couple beyond that. But miracles don’t work that way. Miracles go beyond what we can ask or imagine to meet our deepest needs. And what I really needed was a family.
I remember moving in to their home on February 9th, carrying all of my worldly possessions in two garbage bags and a backpack. I remember the small, quaintly decorated room with bicycle wallpaper that I had all to myself. I remember my first time on an airplane on vacation with them, and meeting the rest of their family at holidays. I remember a million little details, but most of all, I remember February 9th. On February 9th, 2000, the same date I originally moved in with them, we all went to the courthouse and finalized a process that was years in the making. Mine was one of a handful of adult adoptions that occurs in the state each year. My mom and dad adopted me, and officially made me a part of their family. I had been calling them mom and dad for years, but there was something special about making it official.
My personal miracle is that I received a real family. I have a mom and dad and aunts and uncles and grandparents, and cousins all over the place. I get to celebrate two birthdays each year, my actual birthday, and my adoption day. I get to tell this incredible story so that others can see what wonder there is in the universe. In spite of all the difficulties I’ve experienced, I can’t deny that I’ve had some wonderful blessings as well.
What miracles have you experienced in your life? If you have a blog, I encourage you to write about your miracles so that others can share in the excitement and hope your story brings. If you don’t have a blog, post something in the comments section of this article. Whatever you do, don’t keep your miracle quiet.
